April 21, 2009 Am I willing?
Today’s Bible Reading: 1 Samuel 24; Psalm 57, 58; Matthew 8
Scripture Focus:
Matthew 8:2–3 And behold a leper came and worshiped Him saying, “Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean. Then Jesus put out His hand and touched him, saying, “I am willing; be cleansed.” Immediately his leprosy was cleansed.
Observation:
Usually, the question we have is whether God is willing to heal us. That is certainly the question this leper had, and Jesus answered it for him by saying, “I am willing; be cleansed.”
However, I was struck this morning by another question that I must ask myself and answer first before I can ask Jesus if he’s willing to heal me. And here is the question: Am I willing to be healed?
When it comes to physical healing I’m always quite willing to be healed, but when it comes to emotional healing I don’t always recognize that I’m the one hanging on to the hurt.
Why would I hang on to the hurt when Jesus is willing to heal me? I’m not sure I fully know the answer to that question. Maybe I just don’t recognize that I’m really the one holding back. Maybe I want the person who hurt me to acknowledge his or her part before I’m willing to move on. Maybe I feel I can’t forgive myself for my part in precipitating the emotional hurt. Maybe I get some sort of masochistic pleasure out of reliving the hurtful scenario over and over.
I’m sure Satan would like me to use any one of those excuses as a reason for me to turn away from the Healer of my soul, but think of my loss at not hearing Jesus’ words in return, “I am willing; be cleansed.”
Application:
When emotional hurt goes past the point where it’s a healthy grieving, I have a choice to make. I can hang on to the hurt and never ask God if he’s willing to heal me, or I can decide I’m ready for healing and ask God the question that will set me free.
Prayer:
Abba Father, I’m so grateful for Jesus’ words to the leper, “I am willing, be cleansed.” I’m glad you also heal emotional hurts. I experienced your healing touch this morning. Thank you.
